I had an epiphany today.
It is such a blessing when you become aware and the veil has been
lifted. Veils are typically transparent
but makes what is in front of you blurry or murky. Things that I have known for years – my intuition
and gut, but when it becomes clear, well – like I said – what a blessing. I have known that my parents are truly good -hearted people who are kind, giving, honest, and altruistic. I have
literally been taught to be loyal and considerate. This is modeled behavior. Which is why I am impacted when this is not reciprocated
and even more frustrating when loyalty is expected from me, but I should understand the myriad of
unreasonable, non-cohesive excuses why others miss the mark on requiting loyalty.
(Utterly laughable!)
When people take my kindness for weakness – when it is
absolutely power and strength. I realize that what actually is unacceptable are
the people who are manipulative, take advantage are selfish with narcissistic
tendencies. As an only child and a
parent it is my responsibility to care for and protect my parents and
child. This is a matter of fact and non-negotiable.
I will no longer be quite in order to “keep peace”, “not
ruffle feathers” as though this is some unwritten law. Or essentially encourage, ignore or justify those
offenders who attempt to manipulate, leverage or capitalize on their kindness. In essence, we are not helping these people –
rather we are enabling this behavior.
It is ignorant to just look at what someone has – whether
material or relationships etc. and say it
is okay to do this, because they have this or that. That is not your place,
or give you the right to justify your “user” tendencies.
This has been cathartic and I am grateful for this clarity. I
don’t know if anyone else has had these feelings and if so, I pray for your
clarity and hope this is encouraging.
Mommy & Daddy I truly love and respect you!
